Heeere's Johnny
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In the middle of the Megasale weekend wherein I ended up buying P1,050 worth of DVDs and VCDs that I can't find in the catalogs of the friendly neighborhood video pirates, I came across a stack of Johnny Bravo VCDs. I suddenly remembered how I used to be a bit amused how Oliver, my great trainwreck of an ex, reminded me of that vain, all muscle (or fat as the case may be), skirt-chasing cartoon character with no brain.
I should've seen the red flags even then. Instead, I struggled to make that relationship last six months. What does that say about me?
Correction, what does that say about me way back when?
It was the second week of December when I realized he hadn't told me yet what we would be doing during the holidays. Three days before Christmas, he stopped calling me. I wanted to hang on to my pride, but I gave up and called him after joining my family for noche buena. While everybody else was still rubbing their ham and quezo de bola-filled bellies, I listened to my then-boyfriend finally admit that when he started courting me, he in fact already had a girlfriend--they've been together for three years, and they were still very much together. Up until that moment, I had no idea that I was in fact, the other woman, he was cheating on someone with me...
You've got to love that mean streak of his for choosing that particular night to tell me this. For a time, every little thing would remind me of him, and a I would feel a gnawing in the pit of my tummy. But now, when my thoughts wander to that Great Trainwreck, I wonder, what did I do to deserve the Lord's protection that he took me out from that situation, even if I hadn't gone back to church yet, even if all I did was rant at Him for every itty bitty thing that was wrong in my life?
I truly, truly believe that the Lord made the Great Trainwreck 'fess up so that I'd stop making excuses for him and see him for what he really was. Whenever I remember the Great Trainwreck now, there's still a bit of a sting, but then I sigh with great relief because that ordeal is over, and because I'm stronger, saner and more confident now so I know I don't have to settle for somebody who's all posturing but leaves a trail of broken promises. I know that there's someone coming who'll make me say with conviction, "you're truly worth the wait."
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